It is hard to just shut off feelings when all you have ever been told is to follow your heart
You left
Therefore, my heart went with you
When I lost myself
When I felt like complete ruin
When I felt I could not go on any longer
When it came to wanting to take my own life
I closed my eyes
I felt a flame within
It took all I had to keep going
But I did
Here I am; Years later
I still stand
Transformed completely
Scars remain
They are felt deep within my soul
The struggle I had to make
To save myself
Now I make sure to never forget
How far I have come
Depression does not win
I do
How dreadful and calming it is at the same time to know I have an old soul
I do not relate to those around me for I have the wisdom of generations long gone
I love with all I have and have endured great heartache to save those around me
Quite a tragedy to feel so alone but my purpose is far greater than the happiness I have
yet to know
How beautiful a stop it was
Even for just a little while
I got to meet you — a loving heart and oh so kind
I’m going to truly miss you and all the things you do
My heart breaks as I write this — but I remember
How beautiful a stop it was
Even just for a little while
I give everything I have to each new lover
In return, I am left nothing but scars
Familiar faces become strangers in the same places
As time passes, my heart becomes colder
Until there is not much left of me
I am just distant, numb and older
I lay awake at night not sure of myself
Am I making the right decision?
Am I choosing the right path?
How will I know if this life I’ve chosen is for me?
Am I happy?
Is this my purpose?
I feel content but content just isn’t for me
I wasn’t made to live a mediocre life
I wasn’t made to sit still
I wasn’t made to connect with average individuals
I was made for so much more
Unlocking that potential in me, is the major key
To open a life full of opportunities
I get to my destination
I see there’s other paths
They lead to new experiences, people and places
Is it really worth it to have my future all planned out?
At last I’ve found
You can only truly seize the day
We pretend not to care
We pretend not to feel
We pretend that we are savages
We weren’t born to be this way
Society taught us not to love
I tried my best to stay away
To put up a shield
To guard my heart
How foolish to think I could hold you off
Those eyes
That mouth
This touch
The shield is down
The white flag is up
My heart no longer is guarded
It’s all yours
To keep
I surrender
If I could give you a whole constellation, I would
But this star will have to do
If I could put into words how much you mean to me, it still wouldn’t be enough
For you were like a shooting star, across a black night sky
Out of nowhere, you appeared, igniting light all around me
Since, I’ve been in a trance and I wish to never return
I found that your light is what I needed most
